Funny Page on Egregious Offences in MRT

I saw this on the last page of this week's 8 days, I found it so funny and interesting, I had to put it up here.

More Egregious Offences The MRT Should Be Fining People For

So the MRT folks are so strict about eating on their trains that they'll fine you for just eating a sweet. Surely there are more important and annoying offences that they should be going after?

Possession of smelly armpits when raising arms
Yes, this should be imposed, mostly for guys who stink very badly (Melvin Da Giant and Lei Jun, watch out!!), or guys who try to make up for their 'lack of balance' by putting their arm so high at the entrance of any carriage for all to see their armpit hair and smell them. Raise up your arms only if you think you smell as good as Elva Hsiao, who uses Rexona anti-perspirant spray.

Singing along to your MP3 player
Whoops!! I admit I do that sometimes... in fact, I even dance to the music!! :-X

Leaning your whole back against the pole
Ok, this probably won't be of any help cos I used to do that sometimes, but only bcos I'm rather tired. It's not good having your fingers crushed by someone's sweaty back right?

Pretending to be asleep when a pregnant woman boards the carriage
Shame on those who still do that!! And shame also for those who are being rather ungrateful by failing to say "Thank you" after a random act of kindness...!!

Falling asleep and letting your greasy head fall onto your neighbor's shoulder
Hmmm, good point there, esp if the person suddenly drools on you. But what if it's a beautiful girl sleeping on your shoulder? :-)

Possession of annoying ringtone
This really gets at me, even today. People still refusing to set their phones to silent mode in train, bus or even in church, despite constant reminders. Worse of all, some of them set their phones to ring very loudly for everyone in the bus or train to hear their stupid ringtones.

Publicly addressing your girlfriend/boyfriend by their pet names, eg "Honeybumples", "kuchipoot", "Ong-Ong", etc
Ermm riiiiight... I got no comment on that. But I suggest that lovers hugging and kissing passionately in the train (or anywhere in the middle of town, except for parks or restaurants) should also be fined. No sense of decency man...

Spreading legs excessivley wide and squezing your neighbor as a result (this implies mainly for guys)
Open your legs so wide for what? For everyone to see your coffee shop is it?? :-/

Pretending to be a Jedi Knight and waving your hand in front of the automatic door just before they open
WHOOPS!!! This offence I also did sometimes... :-p

Attempting to read people's newspaper/magazine/iPhone over their shoulder
Esp if it's Zaobao they're reading. Why try to snoop at other people's reading material when you can bring along with you a book or magazine to read at your own expense?

I also felt that the people involved in the PCK Be Gracious advertisement (excluding Gurmit) should also be fined heavily for causing possible psychological damage to us poor passengers; stop playing that music already!!! :-((